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Stimming: The Language of Self-Regulation in Autism

  • Getting Started

As parents of a non-verbal autistic son, we’ve learned to interpret many forms of communication beyond spoken words. One of the most significant, and often misunderstood, is what’s known as “stimming.” Hand-flapping, rocking, humming, spinning – these are just a few examples of self-stimulatory behaviors. For a time, we were told it was a “bad” behavior to be stopped. But we’ve learned that for our son, and for so many autistic people, stimming is as natural and necessary as breathing. It’s not a random quirk, but a purposeful action that helps them regulate their sensory input and emotions.

What is Stimming, and Why Does it Happen?

Stimming, short for self-stimulatory behavior, refers to any repetitive physical movements or sounds that an individual engages in. We all do it to some degree: bouncing a leg, tapping a pen, twirling hair. For autistic people, stimming is often more noticeable, but it serves the same purposes, just on a more vital level. Through observation, education, and listening to autistic voices, we’ve come to understand that stimming is a vital tool for self-regulation.

The Core Functions of Stimming

Think of stimming as a multi-tool for navigating the world. It helps with:

  • Sensory Regulation: The world can be a sensory minefield.  A rhythmic, predictable stim can help block out overwhelming sights or sounds. Conversely, if a person is feeling under-stimulated and needing more input to feel “just right,” it can provide the sensory input their body craves. For our son, when he’s feeling anxious, overstimulated, or even intensely joyful, his stims often increase as a way to find internal balance and comfort. It’s his way of managing his sensory world and emotional landscape. These actions can take on many different forms, as unique as the individuals themselves. For instance, with our son, we often see a gentle hand flap when he’s particularly excited or a rhythmic rocking motion when he’s processing a lot of sensory information around him. Other common stims include spinning objects, pacing, humming, repeating certain words or phrases, or even specific ways of looking at lights or patterns. These actions can involve any of the senses and vary greatly person to person.
  • Emotional Expression and Regulation: Stimming is a powerful way to manage feelings.  It can be incredibly calming during moments of stress or anxiety. It can also be an outward expression of pure joy and excitement. We’ve noticed a clear pattern in our son’s stimming: it often becomes more pronounced during times of heightened emotion. Whether it’s intense joy and excitement (like when he anticipates a favorite activity) or significant stress and anxiety (such as during unexpected changes in routine or overwhelming sensory input), his stims tend to increase. Recognizing this pattern helps us understand his emotional state and respond with appropriate support, rather than misinterpreting the stim itself as solely negative. It’s a signal, a way for him to communicate his internal experience when words are not available.
  • Focus: For a brain that can be easily distracted, the repetitive nature of a stim can help filter out external noise and improve concentration on a task.

Should We Ever Try to Stop a Stim?

A common misconception is that stimming needs to be stopped or “fixed.” However, the simple answer is no, unless the stim is causing harm. Trying to suppress a harmless stim is like trying to hold in a sneeze; it’s an essential regulatory tool. The only time to intervene is if a stim is unsafe (e.g., head-banging) or causing significant social harm (e.g., in a way that could get them or someone else hurt).

If a stim is problematic, the goal isn’t to stop it, but to understand its function. What is the stim communicating? Is the person overwhelmed? Anxious? Bored? By addressing the root cause, you can often help them find a safer or more subtle alternative that serves the same purpose.

A New Perspective: Embracing Stimming as Part of the Whole Person

When you see your loved one stimming, try to see it not as a strange behavior, but as a clever adaptation. It’s their way of coping, communicating, and finding balance in a world that isn’t always built for them. It’s a sign of them taking care of themselves. And that’s something to be respected and understood, not extinguished.

Understanding stimming has been another crucial step in our journey to fully embrace neurodiversity. It’s about recognizing and respecting these behaviors as a natural part of who autistic individuals are. By accepting and accommodating stimming, we create a more understanding and supportive environment, allowing our loved ones to be their authentic selves and thrive.

Disclaimer: This blog post shares general information and personal experiences about stimming and self-regulation in autism. It is not intended to be medical, behavioral, or therapeutic advice. Always consult with qualified healthcare professionals for personalized guidance regarding your child’s specific behaviors, needs, or safety concerns.

Learn about the common therapies for Autism in the next section of this blog Therapies